Dias de los Muertos: Sabado finale

The library in my dream was even colder this time, if that is possible. This time the masked figure was waiting for me. I didn’t even try to escape this time. The figure gestured at me and I felt magnetically attracted to following it. We winded down corridors and eventually found ourselves in a massive chamber. It had a stained glass sealing with hieroglyphs and runes. It was almost comical, because they really didn’t mixed well. The walls also had carvings of chickens with multiple beaks. The word cuck was inscribed in the wall. The masked figure sniggered derisively. I looked at it recognizing something in that voice. The figure looked at me and took off the mask. I felt the coldness stop my heart. I was looking at myself. But not just any version of me. Confident, aloof and in control. This was me, without my flaws. But there was something wrong. The copy of me, gestured towards the left side of the room and I noticed there was a figure bound and gagged. My heart was doing somersaults as I approached the bound figure. Strangely, my dream self didn’t stop me. It was Kristina. She was naked and gagged and was struggling. Her eyes were wide and her face was tear streaked. When she saw me she began to cry and struggle. That hurt to see her that afraid of me. I realized how angry that made me. Then suddenly tears began to well in my eyes. What was wrong with me? I had begin to have violent thoughts and suddenly saw myself doing horrible things to my former friend and the woman I had loved for years. I realized then that there was something wrong with me. I saw the other me stand next to me. Then the other me spoke, “If you won’t uncuck yourself, I will” I grabbed his arm and attempted to steer him away from Kristina. But he contempuously threw me off him. The sneer on my face was so foreign to me. Is this what an evil me looks like? No not evil me. The me that would be, if I was fully immersed in the black pilled community. That much was clear. Suddenly the voices were back.

Cuck cuck cuck… such a mangina…. you will never be able to pleasure a woman

What a white knight going to rescue your damsel in distress. She will never sleep with a beta like you anyways. Loser  loser loser… You deserve to be better. You are white and better than everyone and you still fail. YOU FAIL YOU FAIL 

Then female voices, saying every possible rejection and even pity filled ones. There were excerpts from conversations with Kristina talking about me and how she could never be with me and other less kind conversations. It didn’t matter if it was real. I attempted to save her, but the horrible thing was… I wasn’t sure if I gave it my all. And the other me… well he did horrible things to her. I don’t want to type it. Call me a beta cuck if  you want. But  I don’t care anymore. I wanted out and I wanted out now. The other me approached me and asked me a question?

“Did you like it”

And the horrible thing was I didn’t know the answer

Instead I asked him, “Why did you do that”

He didn’t speak but I heard him in my head.

I am your ideal you. I am you as casanova and dream Chad. I am the version of you that embraces your darkness and shuns the normie cuck part of you. You can be me if  you give me control.

He held his masked hand out and in his hand were two pills. One was blue and the other black. I reached for the black one first but hesistated. Then I reached for the blue one and took it. The other me put the mask on again.

Wrong choice bucko

Suddenly the walls of the library began to close in and I was swallowed by darkness. I then saw a light surface. I felt groggy but dragged myself towards it and saw that it was a mirror. I looked at it and saw the inside of my bathroom. Then I saw myself approaching it. I was holding a knife and a smirk. I winked at me and my eyes were brimming with darkness. He held a mask in one hand. I was trapped. I beat against the mirror with all my might as the dark me, went off to do god knows what. Conveniantly, this being a dream like world, I have access to the library computers and have been able to upload this. Please whatever you do, stay away from the dark pilled community. I know it hurts to feel lonely and feel like you never measure up. But if you care about people, don’t do it. Or you might end up like my crush Kristina. Or me trapped in my dream world.

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